Wynyard Hall Winter Wedding

Sarah and Jonnys wedding at Wynyard Hall,
that's near to Darlington . . Middlesborough . . . heck - just google it.

Wynyard Hall - the approach - in the rain - but you can't see it

but to help those who can't imagine it - it was wet stuff that fell in straight lines, downwards.

you knew it was a wedding. so you expected some sort of wedding pictures

here - we have a groom and best man. Groom is called Jonny,

so - in the remainder of this little story - when we say Jonny - you think . . . . . groom.

OK - you've guessed it. (or I mentioned it)

all of the previous pictures were taken in the rain.

there's a teensy weensy bit of evidence in the picture above.

the evidence is called umbrellas

yep. it rained all day. absolutely without an interval.

so you'll find that all of the pictures are taken indoors,

which, fortunately wasn't really a problem.

Jonny sits in the chapel awaiting his bride.
(I say Jonny - you think groom - got it ?)

Sarah and her father enter the chapel at Wynyard Hall

the geezer fozziking about in the background is the chauffeur.

I'm not sure what he's up to . .

it's likely that he's arranging the dress or something.

Music plays - everyone stands up.

Sarah and her father begin the walk up the aisle.

hey - I didn't tell you who Sarah was . .

she's the bride.

as if by magic - I am in two places at once and am thus able to get

a picture of Sarah (you remember she's the bride) walking up the aisle with her father.

actually - I am not in two places at once,

the trick above is simply done with time travel,

I freeze time in the black and white picture above,

then I make my leisurely way up to the top of the aisle to get the second picture.

the advantages of this time travel are amazing,

it gives me time to have a sandwich and a coffee whilst time is frozen,

and no one is any the wiser.

They reach the top of the aisle,

I have another sandwich and a coffee,

then teleport to the entranceway so that I can take another picture

Ah - I'd better get serious here - at least Jonny is getting serious

it looks like he's married Sarah - either that or he's kissing some unmarried woman in a church.

Done it . .. I love it when even the vicar is delighted with the result.

(some vicars can be lovely and some can be devils,

they're people like anyone else)

this vicar was of the really nice, reasonable, good guy variety.

and it's done ! Sarah and Jonny leg it down the aisle, sundry paparazzi pop off flashes to add atmosphere,

whereas - outside - the atmosphere is distinctly damp.

in fact if you step outside - there's a good chance you'll get clobbered over the head by either a moggy or a hound of some description.

(it's still raining cats n dogs).

an exit from the chapel into the wedding car

overseen by a chauffeur who is definitely staying dry.

now - there's a story here.

two little bridesmaid type girls, well - maybe not bridesmaids, but certainly little girls, had the job of distributing rose petals and lobbing the aforementioned pieces of plant at our bride and groom.

All of this was to be done in radiant sunshine outside of the chapel.

well - the more observant of you might have noticed that it rained all day.

so we did it indoors. a bit staged - but hey - the little girls had really looked forward to their job, and if we didn't organise it - it wouldn't have happened, they would have gone home looking sad. you know the kind of thing.

they loved it.

I notice two hands playing a piano.

Then step back in amazement - the hands are attached to a feller
the feller is directing the hands to play the piano.
this is in the statue gallery at Wynyard where the guests are having drinkies.

Sarah and Jonny hop outside - well - staying within the cover of the portico topped by corinthian columns (I only added that bit so that I'd sound intelligent).

anyway - we took a couple of pictures - Sarah smiled, Jonny kissed her.

aw - shucks - you know the sort of thing.

back indoors - we find a bridesmaid emerging from a big furry thing, clearly enjoying herself.

and here we have Sarah (centre)

flanked by Idunnowhosheis (left)

and Ihaventthefoggiestwhoshemightbe (right).

our confetti hurling little girls now take up the standard little girl position in a grown up world.

one tries to look interested in the grown up conversation which she clearly understands,

and the other little character connects with the camera.

You didn't think we'd let her get away without taking a couple of pictures did you ?

above. Sarah,

behind Sarah. lots of books (the library)

and another Sarah picture - the doorframes give away a hint of the sheer scale of this place.

Ooh - I nearly forgot.

the ballroom set for dinner

and in the foreground - quite an unusual wedding cake.

(lots of little twinkly lights on table dekkies in the background)

and this is . . err . . well - I looked up and just saw it.

Brides father sits down immediately prior to meal

Brides father stands up to make speech.

are you following this - I'm trying to keep the narrative simple.

Brides father makes Spee. . .

heck - I've already done that one.

Sarah and Jonny smile at the speeches

entire room smiles at the speeches

well - I'm sure that most of the room did,

I didn't check absolutely everyone to make sure they were smiling,

but it seemed like they were - thus I feel able to make the sweeping statement above.

Just for the heck of it - I photograph the room from the doorway

somewhere in the distance - in the window aperture beside the curtains . . . the speeches continue

(the curtains are a hint to show you where to look in order to find the window)

Jonnys mum above and above Jonnys mum is Jonny.

(this is to help you navigate the pictures)

OK. this is me trying to be arty

the picture above is a portrait of the band.

well - it shows the sax and the double bass soft in the background

and err . . a hand which is playing the sax.

there was a mouth also playing the sax, but I couldn't fit it into the picture,

if anyone tells you that a portrait has to show someones face - tell em to get lost,

this picture quite clearly says 'band' (that's my story and I'm sticking to it).

one crooner crooning.

since this was a Christmas wedding - I should have made up some sort of rhyme

y'know - 6 lords a leaping, partridge in a pear tree and all that.

this isn't as silly as it sounds

we did have 2 gold rings

and one crooner crooning.

two dancers dancing . . . .

and mum takes a picture

bands eye view - for this I snuck ( not sure if snuck is a word . .but hey ho),

I snuck behind the band and hid behind a large plant,

lens poking out and occasionally making a clicking noise.

(I make the clicking noise with my tongue - it makes people think I'm busy with the camera)

& here we have the cast of thousands - these are Jonnys friends

shooooos - special shoooos from Spain.

why the newspaper ????

the date of the wedding was December the 19th.

I found an old newspaper in the place dated, same date as the wedding.

(but since it was an old newspaper - the date on it was . . . a while ago)

not sure at all why I did this, it was just there, and err. why not.

guests hand writes in guest book

remainder of guest is in the shadowy bit of the picture to the left

well - a bit more to the left than you can see really.

still raining. who the heck cares . .

I get a couple of pictures of our heroes Sarah and Jonny at the front of the building,

then I disappear into the night.

(as I am prone to do in such situations).

the end.

(or the beginning - depending upon who you are . . . !)